Connie's Testimony: The Goodness of God

Thank you.

It's time. Are we ready? Cole, are we on? All

right. I just want to introduce Connie Wiley.

So Connie, um, Connie is incredible. So,

so I really didn't know Connie until probably about

six months ago or so. So the more I get to know her, the more I'm like, man, this woman's

absolutely incredible. And her story is like, will blow your mind. So

So, let's just open in prayer.

Jesus, just thank you for this Tuesday.

Thank you for that we have air in our lungs this morning and purpose in our lives.

And we get a chance to do your will.

And Lord, I just pray that you just ease Connie's nerves and

just let the Holy Spirit take over.

In your name we pray. Amen.

Hello, my name is Connie Berkey Wiley.

I am going to share.

you a little bit about the goodness of God and what he has done in my life. But

before I can do that, I have to let you know a little bit of where I come from,

who I am, and what brought me to where I am today. I

grew up in Banks County,

Georgia. I was the oldest daughter. I had a mother and

a father that I loved dearly.

He was the apple to my eye.

I was an only child for seven years.

He adopted me when I was two years old.

My mother was a single mother and they got married and he adopted me.

At that point I did not know that, did not know that till I was 13 years old.

I found out it became a very radical teenager

hormones doing well.

they do but the person that I love so much I felt like he didn't love me

anymore the devil found a foothold in my mind it just grew and

grew and grew and

I never felt part of that family I had a brother and two sisters but I

didn't

feel a part of I came in a my parents my

mother was a very God -fearing woman she

went to church she was a praying woman

And I graduated high school, got accepted to college, went to college.

And when I went to college, I found alcohol.

So did I.

I found alcohol, and it took away everything inside

of me that was missing.

I could talk to you.

I thought I was pretty.

I thought it was beautiful I could talk to guys I could dance it gave me

everything that I thought I was missing so and

I was a very functional drinker

for many years got married to

well I joined the Navy met a Navy man married

him did well in the Navy and the Navy taught

me how to really drink

Because if you want to learn how to drink, become a Navy member.

You will learn how to drink, and you will be good at it.

And I did well in the Navy.

I was a master at arms, so I was a police officer.

I'm a little spunky.

I seem reserved, but I'm a little spunky.

Good Irish girl.

My biological father was Irish.

good Irish girl. My mother's father was Irish, so I

have a little spunk in me. So I joined the Navy.

I'm an alcoholic. I am a full -fledged alcoholic by this time, but I am functional. I

have a good

job. I have two beautiful children, a husband that's

very successful, and he drank too. We

were both in the Navy. We drank.

So I looked at him one day and I said, you're an alcoholic.

You need to quit drinking.

He quit.

I did not.

Fast forward, my alcoholism is pretty, it's

pretty, it's advancing.

But it wasn't, it wasn't enough.

I still needed other things to fill my void.

to make me feel whole because I had a God -sized hole in my

gut that my husband couldn't feel,

my children couldn't feel it because, and they were my world. I would have died for

them,

but they could not feel the hole in me. So I went on

a downward spiral.

My sister died in 1996. My sister died.

She was in a freak car accident, and she died.

And she was my best friend.

And when she died, I got so angry

at God.

I was like, how could you take someone who was good and leave me

who was bad?

And at that point, I was like...

I you know I knew who God was I'd been raised

in church I knew who he was but I didn't think that

he knew who Connie was anymore and that and since he didn't know

who I was and he wasn't giving me

what I needed or or what I thought I wanted I was like I'm not

gonna I'm not gonna follow you

anymore I wasn't following him anyway but I made a declaration

that I wasn't going to follow him. I was going to join the other

team. And I joined. And I went down a road that

is like a B

movie, you know, drugs, alcohol. I ran with

serious criminals.

Stole every day to feed a drug habit that I can't

even imagine

today that I lived through that.

Sometimes I look at my life back then, and I'm like, I don't know how I made it out

of it.

And I barely didn't.

I overdosed twice.

I was shooting about $1 ,500 worth of heroin

on a daily basis.

Yeah.

I had...

That was what, 1990s prices?

Yeah.

I had a fence because...

We stole everything that didn't, well if it was tied down I'd still take

it.

I stole a poor man's trailer three times in a row.

He would go to insurance and get a new one and I would take it.

He would get another one and I would take it and I was like I'm going to quit taking

it because his insurance is going to not believe that somebody is stealing his trailer every

quit taking it, but I stole on a daily basis. I love trailers full of equipment. This

would have

been like, whoa, I have arrived. Yeah,

it would have been pay dirt. Because I had a fence that

would take anything that I would bring to him. I was a great thief because I didn't look like a

thief. I looked like a soccer mom. So I could walk into grocery stores. We also took steaks.

So I

could take a cartload of steaks.

walk them out the door and they look I look like a soccer mom having a barbecue

so it was a good thing but you

know every night I would sit on my bed and

I

was like I do not want to do this tomorrow please whatever

God that's

there if you hear me please take me out

the hell that I'm going to can't be no worse than the hell I'm living today

and

to this day I can still feel how that felt when

I would sit on the side of my

bed going there's no way out of this I'm going to die from this

you know my

only

thing I wanted to kill my

but I was too chicken and my mother had already dealt with

losing a child from

suicide my youngest sister killed herself and I was like my mother

will be

able to handle that her daughter died accidentally versus

she put a pistol to

her forehead so my goal was that I'm gonna shoot enough dope that

will kill

my body and I

Boy, did I try. I got arrested on March

18, 2005. The day before March 18, I

overdosed. I was dead, but they brought me back to life. You

know, the drug addict's

code is if you overdose, we'll try for a few minutes to revive you. If

not, you get

you get placed somewhere to be found. So, you know, I

probably close to becoming part of the drug addicts code and being left somewhere. But

I came back not brain dead. I

came back and I was like they were like you were dead. I

was like well give me more it wasn't enough. So well

so you know every night I was going

God take me out of this. God take me out of this. Take me out of this. Well

he

March 18th I got arrested by Cobb County Police with drugs

in my car stolen goods

in my car and multiple

IDs because I would be whoever you whoever I needed to

be at that moment so I handed the cop a ID and he's

like when's your birthday I

was like

whatever's on that card and he's like this is not you

and then I gave him my

real one he goes now this is you so they had arrested me and I was

baking cookies

in because yes I own a bakery so y'all get some treats so I had some cookies

because I baked for restaurants on the side too because on my own I was

trying

trying to get clean I had started attending a church in Cod County

worked for a couple of Greek restaurants and did all their desserts, had

started up a business,

had an order for 200 cakes in a jar that I'd started, and I

got arrested.

But God sent, you know, I'd been praying, get me out of this.

God sent angels.

They just had silver bracelets, which were handcuffs.

So that saved my life.

I went to Cobb County Jail.

My co-defendant also went to Cobb County Jail.

There was a man in my life at that point.

My picker was broke.

He was a fixer-up for me.

I chose him because I thought I could fix him and get

him.

And then how good I would feel is that I brought somebody from

the depths.

Well, that doesn't work.

He brought me to.

his level. So he was my co -defendant, and

he got arrested too that day. He got out, left

me in. Thank God he got out, left me in, because in his

stupidness he robbed a cops, and he

got beat up pretty bad, and he's still in prison to this day. So

I'm sitting in.

Cobb County jail. And the jail had these little church ladies would come and they

would pass out

our daily bread. And I was like, I don't want that. I

don't want to talk about your God. Don't

want to read about your God. So if you didn't take them, then they'd really want to talk to

you about their God. So I said, just give me that. I'll read it. There ain't nothing else to do here

but to read. I was in Cobb County jail for 90 days.

before and i'll get to that in a second but they would come like

three times a week and i only

got three different little daily bread things they

were the same one was our way back home

one was about the prodigal son and one was guidepost

how to get there so that's what i got to read

I kept getting the same ones and I was like after I got in a couple times I

was like damn

what what are you trying to say to me and I

surrendered in Cobb County Jail that

I can't beat you I cannot beat you I've tried but I cannot

beat you and I called my mother whom I

hadn't talked to in like six years I had no idea where I was at and

I called her

and I said I need help and she's like I can't help you I was like damn

like

three or four days later they called you have a visitor I was like well they're

confused nobody's here to visit me and I walk out and it was

a man and I'm like

you. He goes, I am the pastor of Nails Creek Baptist Church

in Carnesville, Georgia. He

goes, your mom wants me to talk to you. I was like, okay. So

we talked and we talked

about me getting help and going to rehab and I was like, yes, I want help. I

do not want

to die disconnected from everyone.

I love my children didn't know me anymore they hadn't spoke to me in

five

years nobody had I had been so far underground in the drug world

it was it

was crazy things I saw people shouldn't say it

is not a pretty world out there

you know when I was drinking I was like I will never

Drink out of a paper bag. I'll never be homeless. I'll never use

a needle and I became everything that I said never would become

Drugs and alcohol became my master. I was their slave. They were my master.

They were my king. They were my god. They were everything

So I went to you know my parents picked me up from jail bonded me out

Took me to

rehab got me a carton of cigarettes because I smoked then that's 20 years

21 years ago I smoked then got me a carton of cigarettes and

some clothes

and they're like that's all we can do for you so I went to rehab come

to terms

with some of my thoughts and it was eight weeks eight

weeks

You know, my counselor there, she goes, she

got a handful of paperclips, and she put them on the desk.

She goes, this is eating too much.

This is gossiping.

This is burglary, stealing.

And she goes, God sees all of those the same.

Sin is no different to him.

and that was a start for me that all the horrible stuff that I had

done in the world

God it didn't matter he saw it all the same so that started my

journey of recovery

and finding a relationship with God that was sufficient to keep me sober

it was a wild first year ride but

I made a year sober my parents

And my mother gave me my first year job.

Me and my mother were exactly alike.

We were both very dominant, controlling women.

I am her today.

I am my mother today.

My mother passed away.

in April 15th 2007

I think it's 2007 she

got pneumonia and she wasn't doing

better went into rehab and went into respiratory arrest and died went

to the

wake and all these women were coming up to me you know for all my life

tried to make my mother proud I was like if I do this I won't make her proud if

I do this I won't

make her proud but I always felt like I could not achieve that goal in life

and I went to her wake

and these women were coming up to me and telling me how much how

proud your mother was of you

you know it took her dying for me to know how much she loved

me and how much she was proud of where I came

from and where I was at I am so

sorry no this is awesome um and

it's not been an easy walk for me you know turning

things over to God it's the hardest thing that I have ever done in

my life

you know I would

the type of person I can take care of this I can do this but it's

different

with God you have to trust and believe that he has your

best interest at heart

and he will do what's best for you whether it feels good or not he doesn't

care if it feels good but he will do what's best for you you know turning

my

money over to God was like I might not get

what I need if I give you first. But when I started

tithing and

giving to God, things just turned around, you

know, and it's not a

problem today to turn my money over to God. There's still areas

in my life that I struggle with turning over to God. But

you

know, I baked most of my life.

When I got sober, I quit baking.

I just found no joy in baking anymore.

It was not fun.

It was not anything that I wanted to do.

Didn't bake at all.

I baked a coconut cake for Stacey Carroll,

who was the director of the rehab that I went to in South Carolina

or the halfway house that I went to.

And I would bake her a coconut cake every year because she loved it,

and I loved her.

So she's the only person.

I would bake for. Two years ago I got diagnosed with leukemia.

Baking became an outlet to

deal with having leukemia. And a dream I had all my life

was to open a bakery. I had looked

at it like seven years ago and it just couldn't do it. I just couldn't

do it. And two years

a pathway open to start opening a bakery and we started

we got the building and then January of

that year my husband has a heart attack and dies in our bedroom

he is here though so he didn't

uh he they worked on him 20 minutes in our bedroom and

here he is walking talking god

wasn't finished with him yet

so he's still here, and that man made my dream come

true.

He poured, it's his nightmare, my dream.

But we have a bakery that's been open a year and a half,

doing very well.

Two years ago, I got bad

right after I got sober in 2005, but

I did it all backwards.

I got baptized, but I wasn't ready to turn my life

or my will or anything over to God.

So I was wet.

That's all I was was wet.

Two years ago, our pastor said,

you're, if you need to get baptized. And God was like, you

need to go. And I'm like, I've already

done this. And that's how me and God talked. And

he's like, you were not ready. You were just wet.

So I went and put my name up on the, at the, at

the front of the church.

And I got baptized, and it was real at that

time.

I got baptized for the right reason, because Jesus is my Lord and Savior.

He is my King.

He is my God.

And, you know, life is not perfect.

It's not perfect, but I don't have to take a drink over it.

I don't have to go steal somebody's livelihood.

yes trailer um life

is good thank y 'all for letting me share a little bit about me tell

the story about how you met jeff the first time uh stacy

ridley you know i talked to her i was

like i don't want to be alone for the rest of my life but my picker is freaking

broke

and she goes i would like for you to

pray this prayer every day. God, ready my heart for the man you have chosen for

me. I was like,

I can do that. I prayed that prayer probably 18 months. I was in church

and there were people in

the row above me. I knew them. They were in the recovery community and there was Jeff

and I did

not know him. And God goes, that is the man I have chosen for you. It's

like, I don't even know him,

but I knew the girl he was with.

I was her sponsor, and Alcoholics Anonymous, yes.

And I was like, mm-mm.

That night in an AA meeting, guess who shows up?

And once again, the voice is God.

It's like, that's the one I have chosen for you.

And he picked up a white chip that night I gave it to him.

I was like, oh, no.

He is a newcomer.

And I was two years sober.

that time I was like oh no he is a newcomer no

he is not the one I don't

know what y'all are doing up in heaven you must be drinking the wine at the

Lord's Supper but something is going on I met

him we started talking I was like

no he's crazy he is nuts he

is not the one he is the one

He is crazy, but he's my kind of crazy, and we work.

We work together.

I am thankful for him.

He is the greatest gift that God has ever gave me.

I would not be who I was without him.

So, thank y'all.

You're very welcome.

So, the only thing I want to do by close is to say, Jesus, thank you for showing up this morning.

Thank you for Connie.

Thank you for just...

um thank you for your word this morning and thank you for just encouraging that

that no matter how bad it gets you still are right there next to us and you

you just want

the best for us and you want to love us and you want to help us through because you are

you are our only hope and you are king of kings and lord of lords and

jesus i just pray that we

have an amazing day and thank you for connie and jeff i just love them in your name we pray amen

Good job! That was incredible.

I don't know if it's incredible. I don't know if I went over here 20 minutes.

No, you're fine. It was perfect.

I'm going to egg you on and keep going.

I'm going to take that away from you.